Roll-er Coaster of Love

Though the roller coaster of busy-ness of life could earn its very own blog here around the Ford casa(only if it would write itself) that is not what this post is about. Yes, I could hear all of your sighs of relief. Believe me, I’m right there with ya.

Instead I am going to let you in on what people who live in the woods, work where they live, and are mostly socially awkward do for fun. If only these walls could talk… and lucky you, today our bathroom walls are feeling particularly chatty.

(Pause – I will wait for you to decide if you really want to know what our bathroom walls say. If you choose to click the back button, my feelings won’t be hurt. But really, you don’t want to miss this. And if you do click away, be sure to come back, ya hear?)

Good. I’m glad you decided to stay.

(photo & facts courtesy of

So, in the spirit of Earth Day I have challenged Chris to a duel of sorts. After we emptied off our last toilet paper roll two days ago, I said from my throne:

“Hey, you wanna find out something interesting?”

To which Chris appropriately replied, “Not if it has to do with what you’re doing right now.”

“Well, it sort of does, but not really. Let’s see who goes through a roll of toilet paper the fastest.”

“How’re we gonna do that? Each of us has our own roll?”

“Yep. And whoever goes the longest wins. Deal?”

I think I am winning so far, though the disadvantage is clearly mine, you know, being a girl and all. Chris even tried to throw a red flag because I “used the facilities” elsewhere. I accidentally used his roll (only because it is still on the holder, mine is in the basket) and he charged me one extra square from mine for interest.

I told the Program Staff about our little challenge and the boys were certain that Chris would win hands down (you know that whole girl disadvantage thing again) to which I quickly, and possibly without thinking it out, said, “Honey, you obviously don’t know how much my husband poops.”

And while we aren’t ready to install a bidet just yet (please ask my dear friends about my first encounter with this piece of machinery) here are a few facts I found to be quite interesting:

  • We use 36.5 billion rolls of TP in the US each year – representing about 15 million trees pulped each year.
  • 473,587,500,000 gallons of water are needed to produce the paper and 253,000 tons of chlorine for bleaching purposes.
  • The average American uses over 100 single rolls—about 21,000 sheets—each year. (Not this week!)
  • If every household in America switched out just ONE roll of regular TP for recycled TP, we would:
                      – Save 470,000 trees
                      – Use 1.2 million cubic feet LESS landfill space
– Save about 169 million gallons of water

I’ve never really thought about it all that hard but those figures are pretty mind-blowing. I’m not sure our little friendly competition helps greatly with the numbers, however, I do think twice about how many squares I use each “bathroom session” since we started, less for green reasons and more for eventual bragging rights.

I challenge you to challenge your family in the Roll-er Coaster of TP Love Challenge this week. Scribble down your results here – if for no other reason than hilarity. Good luck and happy wiping!


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